Lead Poisoning

It is just one more chapter in the tortured legacy of the Democratic Party.  One more example of the crazed fixation to European Socialists policies that propel its headlong rush to drive every remnant of small independent business out of the already anemic private sector of the State of Maine.  The Democratic Party disdains small business; especially, the small two to three man construction businesses that work throughout the North Woods.  I am one of these dastardly businesses and so are some of my closest friends.

They call it LeadSmart and, although there is nothing safe about it for the Maine economy, it is sure full of leaden dead weight.  I speak of Augusta’s illustrious “Squeeze every last penny out of the residents and send small business packing” program.  They call it LeadSmart.

It started with a desire to protect residents from concentrated airborne dust particles, which result from extended sanding on leaden paint, specifically for interior renovation situations.  You will never believe this, but the Democrats got a hold of this and decided to regulate it up the Ye Olde Borestone Mountain.  Now it has reached a tipping point.

Some years ago, I sat through a …captivating (ahem), some would say enthralling training seminar, in Augusta (where else), on LeadSmart construction practices.  Part of the session dealt with the dangers, or should I say danger, singular, of lead paint.  You see you can walk up to a wall painted with lead paint and lick it, if you wish, and it won’t hurt you.  It’s intact.  A chip of lead paint could float through the air, somehow lodge in your mouth, and, if by chance you lacked the reflex to spit it out, should you swallow it, that wouldn’t hurt you either; save for the painful excursion through your intestinal tract as it meanders the way towards its final culmination.  The paint chip is intact.  You can look at lead and it won’t hurt you.  You can speak to lead and it won’t hurt you.  This is a comforting thought when in close proximity to Democrats, though I’m not sure they are intact.

The only time lead paint becomes dangerous is when it is sanded into microscopic dust particles and can be breathed.  It is no longer intact and can become part of the breathing apparatus and the blood stream of a human being.  This is the danger of lead paint as I was taught at this seminar.  I may have embellished the intestinal tract thing.

Well, years ago, much to the chagrin of the Democrats, these “dumb backwoods” contractors had a simple solution to this problem.  Don’t sand the paint off!  Scrape it off, peel it off, throw it in trash bags, and be done with it!  Democrats would have none of that.  Mainers were being much too resilient, there was not a sufficient enough burden on the taxpayer, and businesses have not been punished as severely as they could be.  So now our friends from the DeadWeight program, I mean, LeadSmart program have come up with some new regulations with a twist.

My friend, who wishes to remain anonymous, recently spoke with another contractor friend who had come from the latest LeadPants, I mean, LeadSmart meeting.  Some of the latest regulations are if you disturb paint on a pre 1970’s dwelling anywhere, interior or exterior, it becomes a LeadSmart construction site.  The construction area then must be quarantined with poly panel zippered vapor barriers.  You think us little guys can afford those?  We can’t.  So, you the customer will have to.  Oh, here’s another brilliant regulation.  If the wind gusts over 20 mph, the job site must be shut down.  Now, were in the state of Maine can a man even work?!!

If I, the contractor, am shingling your roof on your camp on Sebec Lake and my ladder disturbs a flake of paint on your fascia trim it becomes a LeadBrain, I mean, LeadSmart construction site.  Now if the wind decides to blow across Sebec Lake, which it does EVERY DAY, I’m done, shut down, can’t work.  The Democrats like the sound of that…can’t work.  Now you need nanny government.

Of course, the Demosocialist need someone to enforce these new laws.  They are looking for, I kid you not, out of work contractors to inform on their fellow contractors.  There haven’t been many takers, though.  In Massachusetts, yes, Massachusetts, there has been a whopping one, in Maine, to date, none.  Citizens informing on their fellow citizens, it has always been the crowning achievement of socialists.  Maybe Maine contractors realize there is a new danger of lead poisoning, its called buckshot in the backsides as you’re running away from an angry construction crew.

I have much more to say on this and the Hallmark achievements from the Democratic Party leadership that Governor Johnny “LeadThoughts” Baldacci said had better candidates and better ideas.  I will save it for next week.  Hopefully, in November of 2010 there will be fewer lead sinkers poisoning Augusta.

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